remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Rumble strips road head = magical
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
