Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Randomize