I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
