There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
This toilet bowl is my home.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
