I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
you will always have a special place in my vag
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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