so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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