i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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