Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
NoShamevember. You game?
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
You were trust falling into bushes
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize
