my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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