She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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