Your dad touched me again.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
