And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
