Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
