Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
