So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
