I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
