I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize