you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
