Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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