My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
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