Bisexual people are plain selfish.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
