I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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