fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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