I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
