so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
