you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Randomize
