ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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