looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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