We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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