so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Randomize
