so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
you never un-have a 4some
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
