Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I am never drinking with the goths again.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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