if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
