on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
