Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize