we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
