Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
