We won't sleep together?
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Can't talk, ducks in the car
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize