Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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