My pussy is not your playground.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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