so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
