I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I currently don't understand fingers.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
