No, drunk sperm still make babies.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
