Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
he shaved USA in his pubs
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
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