I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
