I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
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