Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Randomize
