we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
