she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
