So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
