fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize