I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
