How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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